Open Adoption
Priority number one at Heart to Heart Adoptions is supporting you through your pregnancy financially, physically, and emotionally.
Equally important is finding a great family for your child.
You play a significant role in who that family will be.
You also have a lot of choices regarding how much openness there is after the adoption.
Open adoption can create a deep, lasting bond between a birth mother and the adoptive family. This connection can start even before the baby is born, allowing for a close relationship to develop.
You can decide when and how to start communicating with the adoptive family. Some birth mothers want to meet the potential adoptive family before the baby is born. Some birth mothers want to spend time with the family after the baby is born.
You can outline your preferences for interactions during the birth and postpartum period.
Most birth mothers want some level of openness, especially as the child grows.
The great thing about open adoption is that nobody has to say goodbye. Meeting and keeping in touch gives you a chance to build a caring, lasting relationship.
At Heart to Heart Adoptions, we encourage you to sign up for an online computer app called Our Hearts Connect. This free-to-you app allows you and the adoptive family to exchange an unlimited number of messages, pictures, and videos.
We will help you sign up.
Click here to see an example of one birth mother and adoptive family's exchanges.
Understanding Themselves: They learn about their background, helping them develop a strong sense of identity.
Emotional Well-being: Having contact with birth and adoptive families can provide emotional stability. An open adoption allows your child to better understand the reasons for their adoption.
Building Relationships: Building relationships with both birth and adoptive families fosters a sense of belonging and support.
Learning About Adoption: Openness allows for honest conversations about adoption, helping the child understand their story and feel secure in their family dynamic.
Medical History: Access to biological family medical history helps make better healthcare decisions and become aware of potential genetic factors.
Less Shame: Open adoption can help normalize diverse family structures.
Long-Term Connections: The child can stay connected with their biological family, enriching their social network and sense of extended family.
Your child gets to grow up with a strong sense of identity and understand their adoption story from a young age. You can share childhood photos, family snapshots, and moments of your hobbies to enrich their understanding and connection.
Emotional Healing: You may find that having ongoing contact with your child and the adoptive parents provides comfort and closure. You may be able to process the complex emotions that come with placing a child for adoption.
Peace of Mind: Knowing your child is going to live in a loving home that you have chosen can be a relief. Keeping in touch with pictures and updates can provide reassurance about your baby’s well-being.
Maintaining Relationship: Openness allows you to maintain a relationship with your child. You will always feel a sense of connection.
Reduced Grief: Seeing your child hit developmental milestones and being involved in their growth reduces feelings of grief and loss.
Personal Growth: Open adoption can lead to personal growth and understanding as you work to achieve your own goals.
Shared Moments: Sharing milestones and moments with the child brings joy and a sense of involvement in their life journey.
Feeling of Empowerment: An open adoption can help you to feel empowered in this journey.
Reduced Uncertainty: Open communication with the adoptive family can ease anxieties about the birth mother’s intentions.
Supportive Network: As the child and adults form a bond, the child feels more secure, allowing adoptive parents the peace of mind they need to know the child will grow up well-adjusted and happy.
Additional Support: Communicating with the birth family provides additional support and more resources for the child’s well-being.
Shared Memories: Sharing important moments and memories will create a shared history for the child, enriching their life.
Understanding: Adoptive parents quickly learn that understanding their child’s background and heritage is beneficial.
Celebrating Diversity: Diversity comes in many formats. The adoptive family learns to appreciate the diversity in the extended family.
Even though there are many advantages to an open adoption, it might not be the best decision for every birth mother.
Some women, especially during the first few weeks after giving birth, find contact with the adoptive family to be painful. You may want to choose a closed adoption, hoping that it will be easier to find closure. That’s okay.
You may also not feel ready for the challenges of communication. We know that communication can require a significant amount of emotional energy.